Something you might not know is that I used to be painfully shy.
Even thinking of speaking in front of people would send me into an anxiety attack.
I made myself small, I counted on others to speak up for me, I hid behind my camera (I’ve been a professional photographer for about 15 years incase you didn’t know) at events so that I felt unseen.
I didn’t take the chances I knew I wanted to take, I questioned myself relentlessly and I missed opportunities for fear of looking stupid.
Being shy was not helping me whatsoever and I didn’t actually even consider myself shy at the time until I was at a photographer’s event and a mentor came over and bluntly but genuinely asked “Crystal, why are you so shy?
When I look back at that exact event — I sat in the corner and I listened to all the conversations instead of participating in them, so yeah, it would be pretty easy to think I was shy.
This was my wake up call.
I know now that I wasn’t so much shy as I was insecure. I wasn’t confident in myself, or what I had to contribute. Even though really did know my sh*t– I didn’t believe in myself.
I’m happy to say that I am now confident in the woman and who I am becoming. I am proud of the work I put out and how I show up in the world. Of course there are days where I don’t feel 100%, but that’s called being human, yo.
Here’s the thing I always believed that confidence was something that was shaped for you when as a child and if you didn’t have the best upbringing, you were just f*cked for life.
Man, I am so happy to be wrong about this one.
Confidence is not something you’re born with, it’s more like a muscle or a skill, the more you practice it or do things to build it, the stronger it will be and the easier it will get to feel great about yourself.
My journey to overcoming this insecurity was through movement. I was never an athlete and I have the ‘participation’ ribbons to prove it, but I found that in moments of physical activity is when I felt the best–even when I was (and still am) awkward and fumbley. So I ran with that. Literally.
I started going to the gym on a regular basis, I saw improvements in what my body could DO and that made me feel like a badass. So it grew from there, I signed up for obstacle course races and when I finished I felt like a superhero.
It naturally spilled over into my work and personal life and I was able to hype myself up by saying “If you can finish a Spartan Race, you can do this – no problem.”
The key to building confidence in my experience can be broken down into just a couple steps:
Step One: Knowing who you are, what you value, what you believe in and who you want to become.
Step Two: Building new neuro pathways in that brain of yours that reinforce ‘confidence’. In other words: proving to yourself over and over and that you can trust yourself.
No biggie, right?
The good news is, you absolutely can also change your brain into believing you are all that and a bag of chips and you can have fun doing it too.
If you’re like me — you want to know the HOW.
What can I DO today that will kick start this shizz.
I will soon be launching a program that will launch you into action but here’s a starter kit.
Some of the magic sauce in building confidence in yourself is by intentionally putting yourself in situations that make you uncomfortable and/or take you out of your routine.
Here’s a couple quickie ideas:
- Take a different route home from work
- Wear something you wouldn’t normally wear
- Try a new machine in the gym
- Go for a walk in a new neighbourhood
- Try a new hiking trail
- Go to an event without backup
The point is to get out of routine so your brain isn’t on auto pilot! I mentioned before that confidence is like a muscle. So these things are our weights, the more you do, the more you can do.
Here’s some opportunities to werk those muscles:
Join in on one of our many mini adventures!
Dive in to one of our destination adventures! These adventures are designed to jolt you out of your comfort zone in the most fun and active ways possible!
